Virginity

As you find the need to apologize
For penis hammering in four positions
My mind wanders and I think
I must have forgotten about your eyes
And other blue details from that summer

Other things stick to my mind
Like the rain sliding off porch skin
Words like for years you noticed
Pressed lips together in guilty silence

So much has happened since then
I hardly feel anything as you stare
But I take one of your cigarettes
As if it were an even exchange